Scary Stuff

Ten Amazing Horror Movies No One Has Seen

 

For what ever reason, none of these movies show up on the Horror lists.  I have always loved horror movies and I have a soft for them. These below are the secret gems that I I have found over the years by burning my eyes with terrible movie after terrible movie. (I’m looking at you Hollow Man, and The Human Centipede.)

Each of these was special in it’s own right and they all deserve to be recognized for what they are. Almost all of them are  on netflix and every single one is worth your time. I have put in them in order of rarity and significance rather than which ones are the best.

1:     She-Creature  

This movie is one of the Best mermaid movies I have ever seen hands down. Staring Carla Gugino,  this movie was very hard to come by. I caught it on late night movie channel and had to have it. The effects in this movie are amazing and the tone and setting are out right amazing. I am flabbergasted this movie never really caught on.

The story starts out with an old man, and a circus and goes buck wild from there. I don’t really want to spoil anything but this is a very different mermaid movie than any that have come before it. Also, lots of boobies flung about which is nice.

Two Carnies Abduct a Mermaid for gold and glory and that’s when hilarity ensues.

 

2:   The Deaths of Ian Stone 

What a surprise this movie was when I first saw it. This stars Jamie Murray, from Dexter, and Defiance fame, and Mike Vogel(Under the Dome) This movie is hard to talk about with out giving anything away but the actual story turns out to be super unique in the line of movies.  This is one of those classic low budget gems that I never see in any of the other lists and I just don’t know why. If you like a nice twist in a movie this one is for you.  This flick shares a lot in common with Dark City at first glance.  An every day guy wakes up in a different life after he dies. This keeps happening and he needs to find out why. Impossible to go into with out spoiling it this movie is a master piece of horror.

3:      Mulberry street is a nice take on a tired subject. Zombies. These are like zombie-were rats but that doesn’t make the movie silly it amps up the fun. I got this movie on netflix and I was not sad. This stars Nick Dimici.  The characters in this movie are interesting and engaging. The movie manages to make the stupid premise of rat-mutant-zombies and it fun and interesting. Cheap and Campy this whole hot mess is a hell of a lot of fun in a genre(zombies) that has gasped it’s last breath.  Zombies are over but I guess rat-were-zombies are okay.

4:     Behind the mask: the rise of Leslie Vernon 

Another surprise. If you liked Joss Whedon’s Cabin in the Woods, you will like this. This a about am up and coming serial killer who brings a camera crew behind the scenes to see how they train. Insider jokes, winks and nods pursue. Don’t let that fool you. Like Cabin, this one has an amazing series of serious twists and belongs on everyone’s play list.  Starring Angie Goehels, Nathan Baseal, and Fracking ROBERT ENGLUND.(you know, freddy.) This movie delivers frights and laughs and rstill manages to buckled down with the greats.

The insider nods in this movie are thick as thieves. Some of the best parts are when he is hanging out and chatting with another killer who is in the middle of his training.  The Twist in this movie has the pull of a knife being stabbed into your stomach and a particually gruesome death. The mockumentary feel of this movie props it up and makes it great.

5:     Memento 

Memento, by Christoper Nolan(of Batman begins fame) isn’t really a horror movie. This is a good dark thriller thugh that will leave you on the edge of your seat. The first time I watched it I had no idea what it was. Staring Guy Pierce, Carrie Ann Moss, and Joe Palatino, I just got because trinity from the Matrix was in it. Make sure to keep watching for at least twenty minutes because the first part is bumpy. Once you get the hang of it the rest of the ride is worth hanging on for.

Like most horror movies this movie has a significant twist at the ends and I can’t talk about with out spoiling it but I didn’t see it coming and I have watched enough movies to usually guess what is about to happen. This is one that I just didn’t see a’ comin.

6:  The Burrowers 

Old West plus tremors. This flick is gloriously creepy dark mess of a movie. If you like super dark monster flicks and something a little different this  movie will leave you satisfied. This movie starts the always amazing Clancy Brown. His voice alone is creepy and ever since the sow Carnivale  he’s been a favorite of mine

This movie is about a group of Heroes trying to find a family that has gone missing. One of the things that makes this work is the lonely that seeps through the old west. I have always had a crush on modern westerns like Tombstone and this a nice blend of Western and Horror. In book form Weird Westerns are much more common than they are in film but this is one of the best of the list.

7:   Contracted 

This movie is less of a zombie movie and more of a character study as the main character slowly transforms into a zombie from a sexual experience.  Staring Najjara Twonsend, this movie is slow building and super creepy. As horror fans you know what is happening to her but you have to watch it unfold in this slow moving masterpiece. The connection to zombies and STDS in this are clear. There is a little slow roll of her not going to the doctor, but really this movie is about the shame of being raped, and how rape victims often blame themselves.   Don’t expect frothing at the mouth zombies with bad teeth.

8:    Mercy

Very unique for what is basically a witch movie. The Lovecraftian plot makes the flick grab hold where most of these possessed movies all fall into duplicates of  The Exorcist. The story of a loved one slowly succumbing to Alzheimer’s is scary enough  with out extra planar monsters poking their nose in.

The main character of this movie has to sit and watch as his favorite grandmother goes through fits and violent changes. These memories class with everything he has known and the helplessness watching someone you love turn into a monster that doesn’t remember who you are. Like all horror movies this turns that up a notch making it so you aren’t sure that you ever did know who she was and what kinds of things she was capable of. The moral of this story is things come back around to bite you in the ass and there is just no thing as a free lunch.

9:     Feast

A Henry Rollins movie, this flick is a hilarious romp in a desert bar. Classic creature feature with everything that goes with it. This movie is a super campy creature feature with modern trappings. All of the usual horror archetypes poke their heads to to get killed whack a mole style in this hyper active murder fest.  I may just like Henry Rollins, but this movie has a lot in common with old school flick Tremors.  All the horror classic tropes are here. Drugs, sex and a heavy metal score that makes the movie fun to watch.

Sure there is a plot about ancient cannibal rituals but none of that really matters in the end. The only thing that matters is the blood and fun of the monsters attacking.

10:  Dark City 

Dark City is a movie to haunt my nightmares. The gothic scenes and the creapy tomes. Rufus Sewel, Keifer Sutherland, Jennifer Connelly are in this old favorite.  The gist of this weird masterpiece ius that aliens are trying to figure out how souls work by implanting memories in our brains and seeing how they work. The aliens are using dead bodies as vessels to make it extra fun.

The main character awakens with altered memories of a wife he can’t hold onto and struggles. One of the scariest things to me is the idea that we can’t trust our own brains or memories and this movie plays that song to perfection.  This movie is laden with amazing twists. Kiefer Sutherland’s character’s voice haunts my dreams.

 

coleta45

Mad Scientist at Sparkpulp
Travis Cole was hatched from the egg of a harpy in 1979. He was raised in a diet of misery and sorrow. The first book that he wrote was in the third grade titled A TV’s Life. His grammar and skills have only degenerated over time.Travis hates taking in the third person. He went to school to be an electrical engineer and traveled for work for ten years. He started writingawful books in 2008 and things have not improved. Most of the shit was garbage.Travis barely holds a day job as a Software Support Engineer. Most of his books are just excuses to use profanity is bizarre characters and locations. His hobbies include killing transients, gaming, larping.

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